My healing journey began in earnest when I was 40. Older versions of me would say it started in my late 20’s when I found myself in the metaphysical section of a small bookstore in Chicago and picked up a copy of Ask and It Is Given. I had heard about manifesting but didn’t know much about it. The energetic pull to the book was too strong to ignore, and I devoured the entire book within days. This was 2007, when spirituality was still relatively woo-woo, but it spoke to my soul and it was the beginning of a well-intentioned, yet misguided healing journey.

I feel like something is wrong with me. Maybe following this path is how I can fix myself.

When I was in my early 30s, I had a six-figure job, owned a condo, ran marathons faster than most others in my age group, and had a packed social calendar, but despite looking successful on paper, inside, I was falling apart and didn’t know why. I started listening to Tony Robbins CDs, practicing yoga, reading all the self-help books on the shelf, and even tried going to a Buddhist temple and meditating on a cushion until my legs fell asleep, all hoping to find peace. And yet, there was still something missing.

When will I be happy?